Chapter Four "I can't keep doing this to myself," muttered Sheik aloud. He was once again waiting for Link. This time he stood on a small island in the midst of Lake Hylia, just above the Water Temple. Every single time he'd seen Link he had lost control, had started obsessing, had thought things he shouldn't think. And now he was doing it again, even before Link had appeared. He kept remembering that night in the ice cave. He had passed the next night alone, while Link was still somewhere in the Temple below, and all he had been able to think about was the memory of Link's arm over him, and the warmth of Link's body against his back. [i]I am a failure as a Sheikah. I shouldn't even claim the name, I have no control. And how can I continue in my duty when all I feel is dread and guilt? I sent Ruto to her doom. I see nothing ahead but my own doom. How can I go on? [/i] A sound below dragged him from his self-flagellation. The lake was gurgling as fresh water flowed into it once more. Link had succeeded once more. A bell-like tone heralded the arrival of Link from the Sacred Realm. "Sheik!" he called as his feet touched the ground. His face was lit up with a broad, excited grin. Sheik couldn't help but smile back. "The water is rising, and the evil here is gone. You've done it!" "Yes!" He laughed, and just then the sun peeked over the horizon, painting his hair a vivid gold. "Oh, Ruto said to give you her thanks," he added. Sheik stared at Link in shock. "She... she what?" "She told me, when I saw her in the Sacred Realm after killing Morpha, 'When you see Sheik, give him my thanks." "But... but why?" "Didn't you rescue her?" "I sent her to her doom, is what I did. I sent her to her death. How could she thank me for that?!" Link stared at Sheik, his eyed wide. "Her... death? But she's alive." Sheik shook his head. "In a way. Sages stand between worlds. Between this world and the Sacred Realm. And between life and death. They must die while inside their temples in order to awaken as sages. I did save her from freezing, but it was only so I could send her into the Water Temple, to be killed by Morpha, or whatever other monster found her first. And I didn't tell her. I knew she wouldn't go if I told her. So I lied and said she would be safe. And she trusted me and went, and died." Link shook his head. "You shouldn't feel guilty. Maybe that's why she told me to thank you for her. Maybe she knew or guessed, that you'd feel guilty. But you only did what you had to, and she seems happy to be a sage." "I did my duty," Sheik said bitterly. "Like all Sheikah do." "We all have our duties," said Link gently. "We are both doing what we must in order to save Hyrule." "That's easy for you to say. You're the hero! You haven't had to send other people off to die. You haven't had to... to... to watch as the one who raised you goes to her death. You don't know anything about duty." Links expression darkened and his blue eyes flashed with anger. "Don't you dare say that! I don't know anything about duty? I've given [i]everything[/i] to this duty of mine. I never asked to be the Hero of Time! Nobody came up to me and asked what I wanted. They just told me it was my destiny, and if I didn't do it, everybody would die! I haven't got a choice! If I did have a choice I'd still be a Kokiri! That's all I knew and that's all I wanted! I'd rather be the boy without a fairy than the hero, if it were up to me!" Sheik stepped back, shocked by the sudden outpouring. But Link wasn't done. He was shouting now, his face twisted with long-repressed anger. "And don't tell me I haven't seen the one who raised me going to die! You just said that the sages are dead! Saria was the only mother I ever knew, my best friend, and the person I thought would be with me forever! We were Kokiri! You talk about being a Sheikah, but do you know anything about what it means to be Kokiri?! It means we thought we had eternity! And then suddenly we didn't, and now you say she's dead! Or some kind of ghost, or whatever the sages are, but it means I've lost her! I knew that as soon as I saw her again. She's gone, and things can never be what they were, no matter how this all ends! And everything I ever knew is a lie anyway. I'm a Hylian. The Deku sprout told me that as if it would make me happy, but all it did was destroy everything I ever knew! I thought it was some strange spell, that I had become an adult. Now I find out that it was just me growing up, that I never had any other choice but to grow up. No Kokiri wants to grow up. No Kokiri even knows [i]how[/i] to grow up, and I had to grow up all at once, in a single instant! I don't know who I am anymore, or what I'm doing! Sometimes I'm not even sure how I can keep doing it! But I've gone on anyway, because if I don't nobody else will. And then you tell me that I don't know anything about duty!" He stopped, panting. For a long moment there was utter silence. Even the gurgling of the lake refilling had stopped. "I'm sorry," whispered Sheik. Link sighed, the anger draining out of him in an instant. "I'm sorry too. None of that is your doing, any more than your duty, or destiny, are mine. Just... I know all too well what you mean when you talk about duty. Don't ever claim that I don't understand." "I'm sorry," Sheik repeated, feeling horrible. What had he been thinking, to believe that Link had an easy life? He had been so caught up in his own problems that it hadn't even crossed his mind that Link would have troubles as well. "It's all right." Link put his hand on Sheik's shoulder. "I never said anything about it to you. I haven't spoken to anyone about how I feel. So you couldn't have known. So don't blame yourself." "Thanks," said Sheik, unable to think of anything else to say. "So is this where you vanish in a flash of light?" Link smiled gently at him. Sheik laughed weakly. "Yeah, probably." "Why do you always do that?" "It's the Sheikah way. To create a sense of mystery. To hide the secrets of how we come and go." "There are secrets?" "There are some, yes. But this time I would probably have just jumped up into the tree there or into the lake. No need to use magic when sleight of hand will suffice." Link chuckled. "I see. But you say 'would have'. Does that mean you're staying for a while?" "I... I'm just supposed to guide you, Link. I'm not supposed to be your travel companion." "Heh. True enough. And I should go as well. The next Temple awaits. The one hidden beneath a graveyard, I think you said? I can guess where that might lie." "Yes..." The thought was sobering. The Shadow Temple. Where even now Impa might be within. If she still lived, she could not remain living for long. If the Temple's dangers didn't kill her, she would take her own life in order to fulfill her duty. "What?" "Just... nothing. I don't think I want to talk, or think, any more about it. Go, and do what you must. I'll do the same." "All right. But you don't need to vanish and wait for me to leave. Walk with me, at least out to Hyrule Field." Sheik hesitated, then nodded. "All right." Link smiled. Then he reached out and took Sheik's hand in his. Sheik's heart jumped once more. The touch felt electrifying. [i]No. I'm not going to obsess over him. I shouldn't, I can't... but...[/i] He looked over, and met Link's eyes, deep blue touched to warmth by the morning sun. [i]But I can't help myself.[/i] Sheik sighed softly, and answered Link's smile with one of his own. ----- "Sheik! Sheik! Come swiftly to Kakariko!" Impa's voice echoed in Sheik's ears, though the other Sheikah was many miles away. He had been once more shadowing Link as Link made the final preparations before braving the Shadow Temple. But at the mental summons he didn't hesitate, he left Link in the middle of Hyrule Field and went by shadow to Kakariko. As soon as he stepped out of the darkness he knew something was wrong. The air smelled of smoke and the village seemed deserted. And the shadows, everywhere, lay a little thicker than they should. The dark, beating heart of shadow that had always lain beneath the graveyard, where the Shadow Temple held its bloody secrets, was strong but quiescent. But the lesser darkness that lurked directly beneath the town itself was pulsing eagerly with black life. "Sheik." Impa strode up to him, sword in hand. "Impa! What's going on?" "The evil I once sealed within the well is breaking free. Ganondorf's doing, I'm sure. Even still sealed it's grown powerful enough to reach the minds of the townsfolk. There has been violence and arson already. Soon the seal on the well will be broken entirely and the spirit within will be free. And when that happens, things will get very bad indeed. I've sent the villagers outside its reach, but if it's free, nothing in Hyrule will be safe from it." "What do we do?" "You stay here, try to hold it. I must go within the Shadow Temple and wake the darkness there." "What?" "Shadow is a jealous power, Sheik. The darkness in the Shadow Temple will allow no rivals. If I rouse it, it will draw in this lesser shadow. And though that evil may taint it, the shadows will be pure again once the hero comes." "Impa..." Sheik wanted to ask her to stay, or to volunteer to go in her stead. But he was not skilled enough in shadow magic to deal with the Temple. Impa was the only one who could go. "It's always been my destiny, Sheik. You know that." "But..." Impa shook her head. "Whether I fail or succeed matters very little. All that matters is that I go. And Link will not fail. Not with you to guide him." "Me? All I've done is tell him where to go. He doesn't really need me." Impa smiled. "You are still learning wisdom, even as he is still learning courage. But I think you'll soon find that you've done much more than that for him. Now I must go. Hold the spirit within the well as long as you can." Impa turned and sprinted across the village, leaving Sheik looking after her. But a pulse of black power dragged his attention to the task at hand. He ran to the well and focused his will on the disintegrating seal within. He wove shadows through it, holding the tainted darkness that fought to escape with bars of purified shadow. The thing within fought back, and Sheik was soon sweating with effort. It was hard to hold it back. The smell of burning was growing stronger. Somewhere nearby a house was on fire. But Sheik could do nothing about that, all his attention was focused on holding the spirit within the well. The seal was growing weaker and weaker, and Sheik's magic was not enough alone. It wouldn't hold much longer... Then familiar footsteps sounded close behind him. Link! The distraction was too much. His hold crumbled along with the last of the seal, and tainted power came roaring up the well's black throat. "Link! Get back" shouted Sheik. Even as Link turned to run the spirit exploded from the well, sending the beams that had once held a bucket high into the air. They landed some distance away with a clatter. Link turned back to the well, his sword and shield raised. Sheik could see the black cloud that hovered over him, but to Link it was no doubt invisible. A grasping hand reached out of the darkness at Link, and without thinking Sheik jumped in front of it. It lifted him into the air, whipping him around, and flung him to the ground and into a darkness more profound than shadow. Sheik blinked awake to find that only a few seconds had passed. Link was standing over him, sword at ready, turning ceaselessly to try and see the path of an invisible threat. Sheik just had time to open his eyes before another disembodied hand of shadow grabbed Link and hoisted him in the air. Sheik scrambled to his feet, gathering power, but before he could act the spirit slammed Link into the ground. It picked him up and slammed him down again, and then again, before dropping Link's now limp form. Sheik shouted an angry battle cry and struck at the tainted darkness with a bolt of pure shadow. The thing let out a thin cry of pain. Then suddenly it halted. It hovered in mid-air, a roiling blot of black, then it raced away to the north, towards the graveyard and the temple beneath. Sheik didn't follow it, instead he knelt beside Link. Some of the fear knotting his stomach eased when he saw that Link was breathing. A rumble sounded overhead, and rain began to patter down around them. The rain quickly increased to a torrential downpour. It began to put out the fire that burned nearby, but it also began to soak Link and Sheik quite thoroughly. Sheik put a hand on Link's chest. Shadow magic was not well suited for healing, but he could at least try and sense the extent of Link's injuries. He could sense Link's life force, and it was still strong, but it was being drained. Something within him was wrong, broken or bleeding he couldn't tell, and Link might yet die if he didn't get healing. The rain on his face roused Link, and his eyes fluttered open. He looked up at Sheik, pain clearly visible on his face. "What... happened?" "The evil spirit is gone for now. But you're hurt. Don't move," he added as Link tried to sit up, "you might make it worse." Link winced and lay back down. "Yeah. I have some potion..." "Good." Sheik carefully pulled Link's pack free and dug through it until he found a bottle filled with red fluid. He held it to Link's lips so he could drink. After he had swallowed, some of the pain on Link's face eased. "That's better." Sheik placed his hand over Link's heart once more, then nodded. His life force was no longer weakening, and it was probably safe to move him. "Let's get out of the rain." He helped Link to his feet, and they limped to a nearby house, which Sheik recognized as having once belonged to Impa, many years ago. The door was unlocked, and the house showed every sign of a hasty departure. Inside there was a fire burning. Link, still limping but looking at least a little bit better, made a beeline for it. He stood in front of it, dripping. Sheik came to stand next to him. The warmth felt good on his soaked skin. They were both leaving puddles beneath them. After a moment Link stripped off his tunic, and the undershirt beneath it. He wrung them out and spread them on a chair next to the fire. Sheik couldn't help but notice that Link's bare torso was very firmly muscled, lean and yet obviously quite strong. There were a few scars there, evidence of the price he'd already paid on this quest. But they didn't detract from his handsomeness at all. Link glanced over at Sheik, who was not only still fully dressed, but still wearing his mask, and raised his eyebrows inquisitively. Sheik shook his head in response to the wordless question. Link chuckled. They stood there in silence for some time. After a while Sheik started to shiver a bit. It wasn't that cold, but he was completely soaked, and the fire could only warm him on one side at a time. He was considering a warming spell, and whether the power required would be worth it for something this minor, when Link stepped behind him and put his arms around him. Sheik froze in something like shock. "Let me warm you this time," said Link quietly in his ear. "A-all right," said Sheik, trying not to stammer like an idiot. He tried to relax, but his heart was racing. Link, however, simply stood still, a warm presence pressed against his back, and eventually Sheik was able to regain his calm. He closed his eyes and leaned back into Link's embrace just a bit. They stood like that for a very long time, the only sound the crackling of the flames. After a long time, when they were both no longer soaked, though perhaps still somewhat damp, Link shifted, loosening his embrace. Though before he stepped away he turned his head and kissed Sheik on the cheek, just above his mask. Then he stepped back. Sheik, shocked and flustered once again, turned to look at him. Link's cheeks were touched with red, but he merely said, "I think my tunic is dry, and I should probably be leaving. The Shadow Temple needs to be dealt with." "Yes. The Shadow Temple." That thought was sobering enough to calm Sheik's racing pulse. "You'll need to be able to see the unseen, if you are to go there." "Can you tell me how?" "There is an artifact inside the well. Though the well itself is blocked off. But I am fairly certain the artifact is still there." "Then I'll figure out how to find it," said Link with a confident nod. "I'm sure you will. Before you go, you'll need a song. Play it to reach the Shadow Temple." Link lifted his ocarina, and once more he and Sheik played together. Sheik felt a pang of regret at the thought that there was only one temple remaining, one more occasion to guide Link on his quest. He almost wanted to ask Link to postpone visiting the Temple, to stay here with him for just one night. But duty prevailed and so he simply played, and said nothing. When the music ended Link pulled his tunic over his head and donned his sword. "Until we meet again," he said, and then he was gone out into the rain that still pattered gently down outside. ----- The desert's shadows were stark and black. There were few of them, but they were strong, and Sheik had no trouble following Link to the Desert Colossus. Link had emerged victorious from the Shadow Temple the day before, and now had nearly crossed the haunted waste that barred the way to the Spirit Temple. Sheik had not spoken to him since Kakariko Village. Sheik felt a shadow on his heart as he walked through shadows, always staying near Link, but never within sight. He was still mourning Impa, and he was also still conflicted. His emotions tugged him in too many different directions. He wanted to tell Link how he felt, but he didn't even know what he would say, or if he should remain silent. Sheik found himself rehearsing possible conversations where he confessed his feelings. All of the imagined phrases sounded wrong. He needed to speak to Link only two more times. Once to teach him a final song and then... then once more, before the end. So if he was to say anything of how he felt, he must say it soon. All too soon Link reached the Colossus. He went directly inside, and Sheik climbed atop the stone arch that stood without and waited. Link would be back before long. And then Sheik would have to speak to him once more and give him the final song. When Link emerged, Sheik leapt down from the arch and stood in his path. There was a long silence, and they both simple looked at each other for some time. Finally it was Link who spoke first. "Crossing the sand was very difficult. And I see one of those seals here. Do you have a song to teach me, so I don't have to make that journey again?" "Yes," said Sheik simply, and took out his lyre. Link raised his ocarina, and once more Sheik played and Link followed. And as he had done what seemed like an eternity ago, when he taught Link the Prelude of Light, Sheik didn't stop playing when the song had been learned. He played on, and Link with him, their notes rising together on the still desert air. Finally they halted, and there was silence once again between them. Link took a few steps closer. "Sheik," he said, and then stopped, as if uncertain what to say. Sheik's pulse was racing again, but he too could think of no words. Finally Link said, "Sheik? Why do you wear a mask?" "I can't say." "You're not... disfigured?" Sheik almost laughed at the solemn concern in Link's voice. "No! Not at all." "Then why can't I see what you look like? This is the final temple, isn't it? I... I can't count on seeing you again after this, can I? Let me see you without the mask." "I can't. I'm sorry. I just... can't. But you'll see me once more, I promise." "When?" "At the Temple of Time. I... There is something you'll need to know before facing Ganondorf." "And after that I'll go, and fight Ganondorf. And either he'll die, or I will... Sheik, I don't want to die without having seen your face. Please..." "At the temple of time I promise that you'll be able to see beneath this mask." [i]See that other person, almost forgotten, who I must somehow become again...[/i] "Why not now?" Link was standing close. Too close. Sheik's heart was pounding. Link reached out, touched him, brushed his fingers against Sheik's cheek. Sheik froze for a moment, then stepped back. "Please... I must go. Our duty... There is no time to waste with this, Link." "Our duty! What good is being a Hero of Time if I can't make time for... for... for someone I love?" Sheik felt those words as an almost physical shock. Link? Love? He couldn't possibly love Sheik. He was supposed to love Zelda, the princess. "You don't mean that. You can't mean that. Link..." "Sheik I..." "No! Don't say it. Please. You have your duty. I have mine. You need to go, and cleanse the Temple, free the final sage. I have things I must do as well. And those things..." [i]Soon I won't even exist. You shouldn't love me. You can't love me. How could the universe be so cruel, as to make you fall in love with someone doomed, like me? Love the princess, when she returns, not me![/i] "Those things mean you can't love me Link." "That doesn't make any sense. Sheik, please..." "No!" In something like desperation Sheik called power, hiding himself in a gust of sand and shadow. Link squinted into the sudden sandstorm. When it cleared a moment later he looked around, frustration written on his face. "Sheik!" he called out, but Sheik pulled the darkness more tightly around him and stepped out of shadows on the far slope of Death Mountain, as far from the desert as he could get and still stay within Hyrule.