BIT Squad: Enter the BIT-verse!
Episode 9 - Bat-BIT Begins

Copyrights: 2BIT and most of his squad belong to the author...2BIT.
Tails and other Sonic characters (c) SEGA
Other characters belong to their respective owners (i.e. Mario (c) Nintendo, Kingdom Hearts (c) Disney/Square-Enix, Pokemon (c) The Pokemon Company/Game Freak)

Considering this series has to have some kind of plot, it was decided to start exploring the Omniverse to see if any answers to the mystery of the Masked Fox would turn up. It's a flimsy pretext, but it works for us. At any rate, it was discovered that Blocky's cartridge-based portal powers could open paths to the Omniverse in much the same way that it could open a path beyond the fourth wall. It all depended on how one blew on the cartridge first. "Alright, we're going in! Bucky, you monitor things from here!" 2BIT said as he inserted Blocky's cartridge into the odd portal console. "What's to stop me from hijacking your portals to return home?" Bucky asked, feeling a bit bored with his under-utilization in the squad. "Um... Vixy, monitor Bucky monitoring us! We'll take 8BIT so you don't have to monitor him!" 2BIT stated, leading Tails and 8BIT to the portal. Dusk talked back from his shadowy corner. "Who's going to monitor Vixy?" You can, smart guy. Anyway, all flimsy pretexts out of the way, 2BIT, Tails and 8BIT arrived in Gotham City, somewhere in the DC multiverse. Who knows which Earth. Regardless, they found themselves across the street from City Hall, which was being surrounded by the GCPD as a hostage situation was in progress. 2BIT found a gawking citizen nearby. "Hey, what's going on?" he asked. The citizen lifted his flashy top hat. "A clown, a bird, a man in a mask, they gather with friends to air grievances past." the odd man said in whimsical fashion. He then hurried away as more police were showing up. "Was that the Mad Hatter?" 8BIT questioned. Apparently. "Never mind, he mentioned a mask! It could be that fox!" Tails pointed out. "Alright, we'll check it out, but it could be a situation... Let's each try a different entrance..." 2BIT said, setting the misadventure in motion!


Going in the rear entrance, 8BIT quickly found the masked man. In fact, he found two masked villains, immediately realizing that 2BIT was barking up the wrong tree. "Hello there, fellow fiends! What are we up to today?" 8BIT said, smirking and trying to act tough. The first rogue, a man in a white suit and a black skull mask, immediately pointed a gun at the fox. "Who the hell are you? I don't remember you on the guest list!" Black Mask grunted. "Check the list again. There's no one badder than me." 8BIT scoffed, showing no fear. The other masked figure was dressed as a scarecrow, but the Scarecrow spoke with a slight air of sophistication. And a heavy air of menace. "You act brave, indeed. Guns don't faze you. So, tell me then... What do you fear?" he asked, tossing what appeared to be a gas bomb straight at 8BIT! The fox coughed as he breathed in Scarecrow's fear toxin. "You dweebs made a big...mistake...!" 8BIT's eyes widened as Black Mask and Scarecrow turned into huge, hideous spider creatures before his very eyes! This was a hallucination of the gas, but it felt real enough to him. "S-s-spiders!!" he shouted, turning to run away only to find hundreds more spiders crawling into his path. Black Mask gave a scoff as he watched 8BIT squirm. "Pathetic. No way he's in the crew. I'll just pop him off right here..." he sneered. "Be my guest, my curiosity is sated." Scarecrow stated. Black Mask aimed his weapon at the panicking fox, but suddenly, a bat-shaped object flew out of the shadows and knocked the gun from his hand! "Gah! The Bat!" he growled as Scarecrow lobbed more toxin bombs into the shadows. However, their target...was above them! A dark shadow swooped down, lifting them both into the air, and left the villains dangling from the ceiling, tied up by a cable. 8BIT was saved by this mysterious being, but how would Tails and 2BIT fare?

Tails attempted to sneak into the building through the vents. Through a vent cover, he was able to locate some of the villains inside. He gulped as he saw a man hideously scarred over half his face. There was also a funny, rotund man in a tuxedo. "I lost the coin toss... But what's an 'upstanding citizen' like yourself doing here?" the Two-Faced man asked the rotund gentleman. "Simply airing my grievances with City Hall, old bird. All these ruffians just happened to interrupt my 'perfectly legal and peaceful protest.'" he chuckled, leaning against an umbrella. A boomerang-shaped object knocked his umbrella from under him, and a boy in a bright red outfit emerged from the shadows! "Penguin and Two-Face! I guess birds of a feather do flock together!" the boy taunted. Penguin lifted his umbrella back up, and bullets started flying from the tip of it! The boy dodged acrobatically and got behind a desk as Two-Face added his own hail of bullets to the attack. Tails made up his mind, and kicked out the vent cover, flying behind the violent criminals. He planted his feet on Penguin's top hat, pushing it down over his eyes! "Wouldn't be the first egg-shaped man to shoot at me!" the fox smirked, flying out of the way as the Penguin attempted to blindly shoot up! Two-Face turned his guns on Tails, but that boomerang (or birdarang) struck his hands and caused him to drop the guns! "Uhh... Thanks for the...help?" the boy stammered, looking at Tails in bewilderment, "Uh, name's Robin!" he smiled. "I'm Tails!" the fox replied. The pair had to take cover behind the desk together as Penguin and Two-Face composed themselves. "Two flighty fools, but no sign of the Bat!" Penguin squawked. "He'll come when he hears them scream!" Two-Face grunted. Tails and Robin appeared to be pinned down, but they seemed confident about their chances... Still, where was 2BIT?

Two clowns were taunting Gotham City's mayor, who was tied up and gagged in his seat. "Mr. Mayor's lookin' awful stiff, Puddin'. How should we liven things up for the ol' fogey?" said Harley Quinn to her Puddin', the Joker. The clown prince of crime gave a maniacal laugh, twirling what appeared to be a squirt gun in his hand. "Well, I don't know, Harley. I mean, I invited so many guests to make this party thrilling for the old coot, and look at him! Not even the slightest smile... Unlike his secretary! Hahahaha!!" he cackled, spinning a nearby chair to reveal the secretary slumped over with an unsettling wide smile plastered on her frozen face. She was dead, and 2BIT was horrified by the scene as he stepped into the office. "Wait, this is...THAT Gotham City? It's...real?" he gulped, knowing that Joker was not a villain to trifle with...from his "research" into comics. Harley brandished a huge mallet, pointing it at 2BIT as he entered. "Hey, who are you s'posed to be? You ain't on the party list!" she sneered. "Oh, j-just... I'm looking for someone else!" 2BIT stammered. The Joker pranced over to the fox and patted him on the head. "Aww, a lost mutant child! Tell me, Bongo, y'know any tricks?" he asked. "I'm not a child, I'm a fox... Uh, I mean!" he gulped, realizing where the Joker's mind would take this. "FOXHUNT!" the clown shouted, and fired a gas from his pistol, which 2BIT had already covered his face to avoid breathing. "Oopsy! Wrong gun! Toss me the huntin' rifle, Harl!" the clown shouted. 2BIT was suddenly knocked to the ground as the Batman dropped from above! "Scarecrow, Two-Face, now this...thing. Your guest list is running out, Joker!" he growled, lifting the villain by the collar of his purple suit. "You just tackled a civilian, Bats. Heehee, you should have tackled me!" he said, popping what looked to be a card out of his sleeve. However, it was a remote for something, and as he pressed the button, a bomb under the secretary's chair went off! It wasn't a huge explosion, but it was enough to shock Batman into dropping the Joker and enable him to duck as Harley's hammer swung by, knocking the Bat to the ground!

2BIT, Batman and the mayor soon found themselves tied up next to what appeared to be a pile of gift packages. Harley loomed over them with a smirk. "I tied it extra tight for you, B-man! Let's see ya break outta this one!" she said before kicking him in the chest. "Now, now, Harley, don't play rough with our guests!" Joker said with a sadistic smile, "Now, before you open your presents, old Uncle Joker's going to get the camera ready! Have to preserve those precious memories...on the internet! Aaah hahahaha!!" he laughed, prancing over to a studio he'd set up nearby to record their demise. "Oh, darn it. Harley! Do you remember the CrimeTube password??" he shouted, prompting his lady to head over to his studio as well. While the clowns were distracted, Tails and Robin dropped down from above, landing out of sight. Tails was about to rush in when Robin held him back gently. "They're probably rigged to blow... We've gotta be smart about this..." Robin murmured. That plan was dashed at 8BIT burst into the room, a crazed look in his eyes. "Those damn spiders!! I'll burn this place to the ground if that's what it takes!!" he was still under the influence of Scarecrow's fear toxin. Joker glanced at him with a giggle. "Oh, Dr. Crane, what a riot! ...Kill him, Harl!" he ordered. Harley headed toward 8BIT with her hammer, only to yelp as he charged at her and tackled her to the ground! Joker gave a disappointed sigh. "I guess my livestreaming career is kaput! I'll do this unboxing video off-camera!" he smirked, pointing a remote at the gift pile. Batman broke out of his bonds in that moment, grabbing 2BIT and the mayor and carrying them off via grapple before the presents could explode! "You call those knots tight, Harley!" Joker shouted. "It's over, clown!" shouted Tails, running up to his studio with Robin. The Joker gave an insane laugh. "I didn't realize we were having an old fashioned fox hunt today! I'll have to be careful not to 'accidentally' shoot a bird...or a bat!" he cackled, lifting up a gun with a silly flag sticking out of the barrel.

What followed was something akin to a campy 60's television show, with BIT Squad and the Dynamic Duo brawling with Joker's goons, while words like "Bam," "Pow," and "Zap" appeared in the air and swiftly disappeared. The foxes decided to ignore that, 8BIT headbutting the goons in his way as he fled the "spiders." Harley chased after Tails and Robin with her hammer, only for Tails to smack it aside with his namesakes! Then, Robin caught the villainess with a...net. Don't ask where he got it. "I'm gonna ask anyway, ya dumb writer! Pullin' nets outta nowhere is cheating!" Harley shouted. I guess comic characters don't respect the fourth wall much, either. At any rate, Joker isn't really much of a physical combatant, so once Batman knocked his gun away with a batarang, 2BIT easily knocked him down with one more "Pow!" The Batman stood over the fox, looking at him suspiciously. "Who exactly are you? What's your stake in all this?" he asked. "We're looking for our own masked villain..." 2BIT stated, "But it looks like we were barking up the wrong tree. I guess he's not here in Gotham..." he sighed. "Maybe we could help?" Robin asked as he struggled to get the cuffs on a feisty Harley. Batman shook his head. "I have a feeling we can't go where they're going..." he stated, sounding like he'd somehow deduced that the foxes were from another world. The Joker tried once more to creep up behind the seemingly distracted bat, but Batman lifted his fist without looking and punched him out. "Ugh... How does he do that?" Joker whimpered before collapsing on the floor unconscious. At any rate, this side quest was over. And now we wait however many months it takes for the next episode. Same Bat-time, same Bat-channel. Wait, that made no sense...


To be continued...