The Vacant Years: Chapter 8
Talikin needed to go to the bathroom, badly, and it was that need that drove his mind to wakefulness in spite of the drugs and comforting touch of his caretaker that had lulled him to sleep. He was back his crib, he realized, judging by the thick, warm sheets and cozy mattress. The fox let his eyes flutter open, and felt simultaneously happy and energetic, filled with a new hope of what his future might hold. But first, he had to deal with his bathroom situation...
"What time is it...?" Talikin said to himself, a habit that he was more frequent by the hour. Talking to himself allowed the fox to set down his muddled thoughts into clear, clean facts from which he could think clearly, so it had become necessary to do it frequently. He looked at the position of the sun through the window of his nursery, and made a quick judgment, "three in the afternoon, maybe four." Not caring about whatever thoughts or plans he might have tried to concoct, Talikin's stomach growled, reminding him of his full bladder and aching bowels... Judging by the weakened state of his muscles, the fox had ten minutes, maybe fifteen, before it all came out whether he liked it or not, and he was confident Sky wouldn't let him use the big boy po- err, bathroom, even if he did manage to wait that long. "Go now by your own free will, or wait until the choice is made for you..." Talikin said aloud, his normally thoughtful mind somewhat clouded by his uncomfortable, growling stomach, and he made his choice. 
Doing his best not to think too hard on what he was about to do, Talikin laid back in his sheets, pulling them over him, and closed his eyes and nostrils. He released his bladder first, knowing from experience that the thick padding wouldn't leak, and immediately felt his diaper expand to accommodate the flow of urine. He'd been well plied with milk that morning, likely the cause of his full bladder, and that made for one seriously squishy pamper. 
"That's one down..." Talikin said to himself, blushing fiercely, and remembered what the rabbit had said the previous day, "just let go..." He did as she had said, laying back and relaxing his clenched muscles, and, without him to stop it, his bowels quickly voided into the seat of his diaper, which sagged under the weight of his mess. "That was gross..." the fox said, trying to close his nostrils and prevent the scent of what he had just done from entering them, even going so far as to stick his nose into the pillow for comfort, but nothing could get rid of the feeling between his legs. Talikin was a messy pup, and he knew it.
Shortly thereafter, maybe a quarter of an hour, the fox heard the locks on his nursery door snap, and the door slowly slide open, Sky padding in almost silently and shutting the door behind her. "Sweetie, are you awake?" she said, ignoring the smell of messy diaper, which filled the room by this point.
"I'm up," Talikin murmured into the pillow, and heard Sky chuckle to herself. The fox grimaced, rolled over onto his back, blushed horribly, and looked her in the eye, "I... I need a diaper change..." he said, whimpering a bit.
"You don't say?" Sky replied, leaning against the bars with a smirk, "were you just stuck in here too long, or is foxy finally getting the hang of making squishies and messies whenever he needs to, hmm?" 
Talikin froze, looking horrified, "N-no! Of course not! I had to go, and you left me in here for hours!" 
"Excuses!" Sky said, and giggled again, "I watched you through the baby monitor, you didn't even bother trying to squirm or call for help. You woke up, laid back, and messed yourself like a baby. Nothing else to it, and don't try to convince me otherwise. Lying isn't becoming of you, Talikin."
The fox didn't even try to defy her, and slunk in his soaked and messy diaper, lacking even the will to resist by this point. "Okay... Talikin said, looking away with a whimper, "I just didn't want to have to fight only to lose in the end..."
Sky pulled down the bars of his crib, and put a hand on the side of his face gently, "I understand, sweetie, I went through it myself. We all did, the moment where you realize resistance is futile, but haven't learned to look on the bright side, yet." She gave him a solemn, loving smile, "come on, cutie. Let's get you changed, okay?" 
Talikin submitted willingly to an ear scratching before the rabbit helped him to his feet, out of his crib, and slowly led the waddling, wet and stinky fox over to the changing table, a change of diaper already prepared for him.
"T-thank you, Sky..." Talikin said, trying to look on the bright side like she said, "you've been very kind to me, even if I haven't always been the best..." he paused for a moment, stumbling on the last word, then damned his dignity and said it, "kit..."
"Well, I can promise you that the worst is past, it's all uphill from here," Sky said brightly, helping her charge up onto the counter and scratching his belly affectionately, "you're progressing quickly... unlike your boyfriend."
Whatever Talikin had been getting at was suddenly forgotten at the mention of his boyfriend, Matt, and, as if to illustrate his point, his bladder released again, the diaper swelling to accommodate, but he ignored it, "y-you've heard from Matt? Where is he? When do I get to see him?"
"Oh, settle down, sweetie," Sky said, patting the front of his diaper, but belted him to the changing table just in case he decided to fuss more. She mulled over the pros and cons of telling him verses not, and decided on the former. It put less valuable things at risk, "I mentioned his caretaker was a friend of mine, and we keep in contact. You wouldn't believe how much of a bugger he's been..."
"That's Matt for you," Talikin said, seemingly more frustrated with Matt than with her or the caretakers in general, for which she was relieved, "what has he done, exactly?"
"Nothing good," Sky said, rolling her eyes and untaping the fox's diaper, doing her best not to get the muck inside into his fur any more than was impossible to avoid, "yesterday he did nothing but fight, swear, and break things, even when his caretaker showed nothing but forgiveness and restraint towards him. And how does he repay her?" the rabbit scoffed, starting to sound as though she were talking more to herself than to him, then caught herself right at the last minute, going silent. There's no need for Talikin to know what Matt had done that morning, or what his punishment had been. It wouldn't do him any good, so she terminated the conversation, "but yeah, your boyfriend is trying to be the defiant hero. I guarantee that won't last long, his caretaker is one of the strongest and most stubborn people I've ever met."
"I doubt hope she's more stubborn than Matt," Talikin said as the rabbit pulled away his well-used diaper, gently wiping him down with a damp rag and disposing of the whole handful of stuff.
"But anyway, enough of these dreary topics. Now, would my happy little fox like a bottle of milk before play time?" Sky said, scratching his belly and nuzzling him as she waited for the fox to air out a bit before putting another diaper on him.
Talikin blushed again, an embarrassed grin crossing his face, "Is that all I'm getting for dinner?" he asked, hoping it wasn’t. He hadn't eaten anything but baby formula since the previous night, and he was famished, despite having done little more than sleep since.
"Oh, of course not! I've got something special in mind for your dinner, sweetie. But I think a bottle might help cheer you up," she cooed at him a bit, scratching his chin and belly until he replied with a nod. The bottle was far from the worst humiliation that he might face, and, deep down inside, he knew it was probably much, much, much better than whatever Matt was going through at the moment. "I'll go get you some milkies as soon as I'm done."
Sky finished up changing Talikin, who was happy to see that his diapers weren't being subtly increased in bulk as he went on, at least not enough that he could see. The diaper she put on him to replace his messy one had the same, puppyish print, and felt about the same when she had taped it up around his waist, nice, bulky, silky soft, and safe. "Safe?" Talikin said to himself, wondering where the strange word had come from.
"What was that, sweetie?" Sky said, looking at him. Talikin blushed and said nothing, so Sky let him be. She unstrapped him from the changing table and patted his belly, "your dresser is in the corner. Pick yourself out something to wear while I warm up some milk, okay?" 
At first the fox wasn't entirely sure what she meant. Pick himself something out to wear? As in dress himself? Before he could stop himself, he asked, "y-you mean I get to dress myself?" he asked, embarrassed, but hopeful that that was what she meant.
"Of course, dear," Sky said, turning to leave, "you know how to put on clothes, right?" She teased him, and walked out the door, leaving it open as a test of his submission. 
"Oh... okay..." Talikin said, the act of clothing himself feeling oddly out of bounds after a few days of being dressed by others. He hopped down off the table, careful to get his legs under him with the thick diaper, then waddled his way over to the baby blue trimmed dresser, and opened one of the drawers. Naturally, they were filled with baby clothes, but the fox wasn't about to object. He had subconsciously realized that trying to maintain dominance meant punishment, while submission meant reward. He was being trained like a boxed rat to be a dependent, needy, submissive kit, and, even if he knew it was true on some level, he refused to acknowledge it, instead focusing on the task at hand.
Talikin searched the drawers, making sure to keep everything neat and tidy as he did so, and took an inventory. There were onesies and sleepers, shorts and T-shirts, a few pairs of jeans, track pants, and other such clothes, all printed in colorful patterns and covered with childish prints. They were cute, the sorts of things that one might see in the kids section at Wal-Mart, and it made him feel slightly giddy, though he didn't know why. Keeping with his plan of 'just give them what they want until you get an opportunity to run,' at least that’s what he told himself, Talikin gathered a small outfit: green socks with paw prints on the bottoms, a dinosaur onesie to prevent his diaper from sagging or riding up, and a pair of blue shorts. He deliberately chose the outfit to look as kiddish as possible, and felt oddly playful about the whole thing. Here he was, an adult male fox with a high skill job in the national military, digging through a kid's dresser for something loose enough to hide his diaper. It was fun in its absurdity, and, with his desire to resist broken, Tali hurried to dress himself, putting the socks on first before pulling the onesie over his head and buttoning the crotch flap over his diaper. He looked at himself in the body length mirror in the corner, posing a bit in his onesie. The fox giggled, putting his paws behind his back and crossing his legs innocently, looking the part of the stereotypical child that was trying to get out of trouble.
"You. Are. Adorable, no two ways about it," Sky said, causing Talikin to jump practically out of his fur, then flushed bright red as he turned to face her.
"I- I- I..." He stammered, squirming in his fresh, snug garments, but Sky cut him off with a chuckle.
"Hush, sweetie, you don't need to excuse a thing. I couldn't be happier with what you chose." Her smile was infectious, as was her giggle, and Talikin found himself helplessly waddling towards her, possessed by some instinct not his own, then wrapped his paws around her in a warm hug. She returned it, despite the warmed milk bottle she still clutched in one paw. "Absolutely adorable."
"Th-thanks..." Talikin said, his muzzle pressed deep into the rabbit's chest, and experienced a moment of the most intense regression he had ever known. Suddenly, he wasn't in his nursery, in this house with Sky, he was back at home, the house he was born into, crying into his mother's belly after he slipped on his bike and scraped a knee. It wasn't even a memory or flashback, just a moment of such all-encompassing emotion that words couldn't describe it, only images, and that's what his mind showed him, the fox not even realizing what had happened until after it had ended, but hugged the rabbit all the tighter for it, tears starting to form in his eyes.
"Oh... oh sweetie. Talikin, what's wrong?" Sky said, holding him more tightly to her breast and nosing the top of his head, confused at the sudden outburst, "oh... it's okay, little fox... it's okay..." she cooed over and over, letting the fit subside as she showed all the maternal love and affection she could, putting her arm under the fox's knees and scooping him up against her chest. Talikin didn't so much as wiggle, just kept on sobbing and whimpering into her shoulder, now, as the rabbit carried him over to the feeding chair and calmly sat down, dropping the bottle of warmed milk behind her. "I've got something very special in store for you..." she said, trying to maintain her calm, maternal demeanor, but couldn't keep the loving excitement out of her voice, and pulled her shirt over her head, revealing her standard issue black caretaker bra. The dress code wasn't mandatory, but it did have its uses, and Sky demonstrated one of them to the crying kit by easily and quickly pulling her bra down one arm and exposing a breast, then gently pressed the fox's nose against it. The rabbit was trembling nearly as much as her charge, now, and silently prayed that Talikin wouldn't reject her. It was rather early for a cub's first breastfeeding, but caretakers were instructed above all to trust their maternal instincts, and hers were telling her that this was the right thing to do. 
Talikin's eyes fluttered open again, but he didn't push away when he saw what she intended, only glancing up at her, indecision in his eyes, then, taking the same leap of faith that the rabbit had just done, took her nipple into his trembling maw and began to gently suckle. It wasn't long before the fox's slowly retrained suckle reflex kicked in, and he faded into blissful insensibility as his feeding wore on, both partners connecting on a level that neither had really imagined before that point. It was in that moment that Talikin realized what Sky meant to him, what she was supposed to mean to him. She was a professional mother. Someone who joined love with training and instinct to create a perfect problem solver that was intended to unwind knots, and give someone who deserved it a second chance at life. It was awe inspiring.
Eventually the moment passed, and Talikin, realizing only belatedly that he had practically filled himself with her milk, blushed and looked away as Sky pulled her bra back on. "Did you... feel that?" The fox asked, looking his caretaker in the eye, desperate for someone to validate the emotions he had felt. She only nodded, and leaned in to kiss his forehead.
"You understand why you're here. I can feel it," the rabbit said, keeping their noses pressed together, "I never knew it what it would be like..." 
They hugged each other close, Talikin wanting nothing more than to curl up in her arms and cuddle forever, but, lacking the sleep inducing drugs from his normal formula, Talikin didn't become drunk or sleepy the way he normally did, but that didn't make snuggling with his caretaker any less comfortable. Eventually she helped him up to his feet, standing next to him herself, and took the fox by the paw, milk still staining his lips, down the hall to a room he had never seen before. It wasn't as big as his nursery, but not small by any extent. The main feature of the room was its emptiness, a large open expanse of floor with patterned tile. In one corner was a plastic fisher-price style table with chairs, the kind you'd see in a day care, except blown up to adult proportions, and a few large toy chests along one wall. Above and next to the door was a reasonably sized LCD television, but it was currently off. The room even had a very handsome looking window set in one side with a beautiful view of the front yard garden, lawn, and the street beyond. Still glowing with the mutual light that had occurred during Talikin's breastfeeding, Sky left the fox in the play room, patting him on the head and giving him a good scratching behind the ears, and turned back to the door.
"I think my special little fox needs something a bit more substantial than milk, so let me see if I can't whip up something yummy for dinner, okay? Have some fun with your toys, sweetie. You've earned it," Sky gave Talikin's padded rear a playful swat, then turned to leave. "I'll be leaving the door open, just call if you need a change. I'm just down the hall, okay?" Talikin blushed and nodded, already feeling his bladder filling again. He'd been a well milk plied kit these past few days, and it was putting his bladder to the test. 
Talikin, still in an emotional daze, cast about the room for his options. He could either sit in a corner and mope, or play like a little kit. "That's an easy choice..." Talikin said to himself, blushing, "not like having some fun is going to take anything from me that hasn't already been taken..." With his justification in place, the fox waddled over to each individual toy chest and took inventory of his choices. There were play mats, toy cars and trucks, a crate of plastic soldiers big enough to hold an entire war, and a great heaping crate of interlocking blocks. He blinked twice, a broad grin crossing his face as he saw the blocks. He'd always loved building things...
With the gusto of a true child at heart, Talikin practically dumped the box out onto the ground and laid out his plans. It would take the better part of the room, but it would fit, and, with the land surveyed, began to build from the ground up. Over an hour passed in this way, though it only felt like minutes to the playful kit, so caught up in his play was he. Talikin barely noticed his full bladder. Wetting his diaper was hardly something new to him by this point, so he just emptied his bladder into it and continued building and decorating, though the swollen diaper was much less comfortable than it was while dry.
"Whatever have you gotten yourself into, little kit of mine?" Sky said, sticking her head through the door and looking over the great wall he had built across half the room, "what, building yourself a fortress to hide behind?" She chuckled to herself, and walked back in, carrying a large platter of sandwiches with her, "I hope you're hungry, I made extras."
"I'm famished," Talikin admitted to himself, one hand going to his tummy, "and those look good..." 
"Well what are you waiting for? An invitation?" Sky said with a laugh, and set the sandwich platter down on the plastic table, taking a seat and watching Tali crawl bow-legged out of his constructs, avoiding walls and towers for fear of knocking them over. "Very impressive wall, by the way," Sky said as Talikin sat down across from him, fingering a sippy cup filled with orange juice.
Talikin blushed at the compliment, and met Sky's eyes, "Thank you for the sandwiches, they look delicious," he said, and picked one up in his paws sheepishly. He had expected something childish and simple, peanut butter and jelly, maybe, but was impressed to find a very well-crafted meat, lettuce and cheese sandwich. Further inspection showed that there were PB&J on the platter, but that wasn't the majority. He dug in without another thought, and practically inhaled four sandwiches and two sippy cups of juice before contenting himself to sit back and purr. "Fantastic."
"Well well, I'm glad you like my cooking," Sky said with a chuckle, finishing a sandwich of her own, brought in on a separate plate.
Talikin slouched in his chair, clearly exhausted from the hard work of consuming food with such vigor, and from the great, frantic bout of play that had been his calling for the previous hour and a bit. Without his consent, Talikin felt his mind start to ponder questions which he had earlier agreed not to bring up again, as well as a few new, equally troubling ones. Why was he enjoying himself? This was torture, outright torment that he was being put through, how had he come to find himself purring and thanking his kidnapper for a find meal? But, then again, was this really so bad? Sure, being forced back into the role, and undergarments, of a toddler wasn't pleasant in the least, but he had attuned to that part of his new lot quickly and easily, and he scarcely had much else to object to. He was being pampered, cared for, loved... And, so far as he could tell, for Sky doing this was its own reward. She asked nothing from him other than his cooperation... or was it obedience and submission? Both? All he knew was that, deep down inside, some substantial part of him was really enjoying his new, carefree existence. What had Sky called it? 'A very thoroughly new you, right back to the beginning.' She didn't really intend to totally change who he was, did she? To tear away everything familiar and rebuild him from the ground up out of the pieces, much the way he had built his wall out of the same blocks that could be used to build a house? Or the way steel from old gun barrels could be melted down and refashioned into hospital equipment? 
As before, the philosophical pandering tired the fox, and, when the leftover sandwiches had been wrapped and taken away, Talikin felt ready to crawl into his crib and pass out, his half built wall and already soaked diaper forgotten until morning. Luckily, Sky was much more aware, and had no intention of letting the kit leak overnight.
"Here, sweetie, let's get you ready for bed," she said with a smile, picking Talikin up off of the plastic chair by his ankles and shoulders like a baby and carrying him back to the nursery, making mental calculations while she did. Talikin would need a bottle of milk before bed to sleep through the night, so she made that her first priority. She could change his diaper with him already asleep, but needed him awake and kicking if he was to suck down formula. Always the forward thinker, Sky had warmed a bottle just for this purpose, and sat the fox down in her lap, clearly drowsing all the while, and picked up the nursing bottle from where she had left it next to the chair. She popped the nipple into the fox's maw and let him suckle the whole thing down, a motion that had become pretty typical for both parties over the past few days. She leaned in and nuzzled him, barely awake, as she withdrew the bulb, milk gone, the dozen or more drugs and hormones that the milk had been laced with taking effect quickly. 
With the fox practically limp in her arms, Sky carried Talikin over to the changing table, and took a glance at the clock on the wall. It was a quarter past six. As before, the motions of the diaper change had become a well-oiled ritual by this point, and Sky knew her work well. She unsnapped the buttons on Talikin's green onesie, which she would leave him in for the night, and took one glance at the soaked diaper before giggling to herself, "Tali, you are one heavy wetter," she said, tickling the fox's sensitive belly before continuing, and searched under the counter for thicker diapers. As the regimen required, she had upped the dosage of 'additives' to the fox's milk, which meant that his current bulk of padding likely wouldn't be sufficient to keep from leaking, large as it was. 
The diaper Sky chose was a light teal, and extremely bulky, even for caretaker standards. After untaping Talikin's padding and wiping him down, Sky lifted the kit's legs and slipped the huge, bulky, crinkling plastic backed pamper underneath the fox's rear, doing up the tail tape first before powdering, lotioning, and creaming Talikin's backside, which was separated from the changing table by three and a half inches of padding. The caretakers kept larger diapers in stock, but those were either for some sort of punishment, or for cubs that, for whatever reason, needed to be kept confined for long periods of time.
Sky finished up the change by taping Talikin's diaper around his waist, kissing him on the forehead, and buttoning his onesie back up, then carrying the diapered, snug little kit over to his crib and setting him back inside, making sure he was tucked in before the bars were raised.
"Good night, my sweet little fox," Sky said, knowing full well that Talikin was fast asleep by this point, "I'll love you forever." She stood there for a few minutes, the evening sun shining through the window, and just watched her cub curl about the giant wolf plush in his sleep, legs spread from the bulk of his diaper. Her comfortable daze was interrupted, however, as she felt her standard issue phone vibrate in her pocket, and walked to the door to read the message. Anyone texting her on that phone, which she was required to keep on her person at all times, had something very important to say. She flipped it open, the screen reading 'one new text: Telia.' She opened it at once, heart rate increasing already, and gasped as she read the text, written in caretaker short hand: 'Matt G-A -Telia.'